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Wednesday 27 September 2017

"My Conscience... Anguish in My Heart."

I ask for graciousness.  As the days continue to be full, as stress continues to be high, as diverse leaders manage different levels of tension and anxiety, may we be generous with each other.  May we be patient, compassionate, gentle, and empathetic.  May we abstain from anger, self-importance, compulsive behaviour, and discouragement.  May we know and follow Jesus more closely, seeking justice, loving kindness, and walking humbly.


Romans 9 1-5
9I am speaking the truth in Christ—I am not lying; my conscience confirms it by the Holy Spirit— 2I have great sorrow and unceasing anguish in my heart. 3For I could wish that I myself were accursed and cut off from Christ for the sake of my own people, my kindred according to the flesh. 4They are Israelites, and to them belong the adoption, the glory, the covenants, the giving of the law, the worship, and the promises; 5to them belong the patriarchs, and from them, according to the flesh, comes the Messiah, who is over all, God blessed for ever. Amen.


1) "...the truth in Christ;" "...I have great sorrow;" "...unceasing anguish in my heart;" "...for the sake of my own people;" "...my kindred according to the flesh;" "...unceasing anguish in my heart;"


2) There is a "but" coming, the reason for Paul's anguish.  I appreciate the sense of "unceasing anguish in my heart."  I think I'm there.  As I encounter my own shadow again and again, it's "unceasing anguish in my heart," that wells up.  Awareness that there is nothing I can do to will my shadow away... or the shadow of my community/country/species/planet.  And the more I ignore/deny/resist my shadow, the more authority it has.  The more I try to suppress or avoid my shadow behaviour, the more it asserts itself in the very way I would stop it.  The only thing that reduces the power of shadow is to acknowledge it, stay aware of it, and offer it, humbly, to God.  "The adoption, the glory, the covenants, the giving of the law, the worship, and the promises;" make no difference except to perhaps raise my awareness. Only humble submission and grace rob shadow of its power.  God help us all.


3) To acknowledge the "unceasing anguish in my heart," and just let it be.  To hold that anguish up in humble supplication, again and again and again.


"Holy One, may your grace prove always to be greater than our anguish."


Breathprayer: "My conscience... anguish in my heart."



Tuesday 26 September 2017

"The Love of God... in Christ Jesus."

I ask for the grace to pray and meditate faithfully.  I ask for patience, tolerance, empathy, and compassion.  I ask to abstain from anger, anxiety, arrogance, compulsive behaviour, discouragement, self-importance.  I ask to know and follow Jesus more closely, seeking justice, loving kindness, and walking humbly.


Romans 8:37-39
37No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. 38For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor rulers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, 39nor height, nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.


1) "More than conquerors;" "...him who loved us;" "...nor anything else...will be able to separate us from the love of God;" "...nor anything else in all creation;" "...the love of God in Christ;" "...more than conquerors;" "...through him who loved us;"


2) There simply isn't anything that can separate us from the love of God through Christ.  Paul's eloquent conclusion to a rich chapter.  Do we believe this?  Are we convinced?  "...neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor rulers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God."  Are we always convinced?  While nothing separates us from the love of God... something does separate us from the conviction that nothing separates us from the love of God!  We do not understand ourselves!  What is required for conviction? 


3) What is the invitation in all this?  To hand over assent.  To let ourselves be convinced.  To let go of resistance to the absolute inseparability of us from God's love through Christ Jesus.  To practice sitting in the conviction.  Just sit in the conviction that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor rulers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor power, nor height, nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.


"I ask for the grace of conviction.  I ask to be able to rest in that conviction.  I ask for the conviction to fill me from my toes to the top of my head and to flow out my fingertips.  I ask that my thoughts, words and actions be motivated by nothing but this conviction."


Breathprayer: "The love of God... in Christ Jesus."



Monday 25 September 2017

"Christ Jesus... Intercedes for Us."

I ask for the grace to grow, the grace to meet the challenges that are meeting us daily, the grace to adapt by letting go and trusting that God is with us, providing what we need along the way.  May we seek justice, love kindness, and walk humbly.


Romans 8:31-36
31 What then are we to say about these things? If God is for us, who is against us? 32He who did not withhold his own Son, but gave him up for all of us, will he not with him also give us everything else? 33Who will bring any charge against God’s elect? It is God who justifies. 34Who is to condemn? It is Christ Jesus, who died, yes, who was raised, who is at the right hand of God, who indeed intercedes for us. 35Who will separate us from the love of Christ? Will hardship, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword? 36As it is written,
‘For your sake we are being killed all day long;
   we are accounted as sheep to be slaughtered.’


1) "God is for us;" "He who did not withhold his own Son;" "...God who justifies;" "...It is Christ Jesus... who intercedes for us;" "Who will separate us from the love of Christ;" "...hardship...distress... persecution...famine...nakedness...or peril...or sword;" 


2) Once again Paul waxes eloquent.  He's revving up for the big conclusion.  "Who will separate us from the love of Christ?  Will hardship, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword?"  God has already given so much, is there anything God will withhold in order to keep us close, in order to set us in right relationship?  God withholds nothing.  Why is it so hard to hold on to this on a daily basis?  Why do we think that we are only saved by our own labour or our own will?  I don't particularly like the God is for us language, it suggests that God is against others.  It makes me think of the lyrics to a song the Pentecostals wanted us to sing in a cantata in a small town I once served.  I couldn't participate, singing the words, "God is on our side!"  God doesn't "choose sides."  "Sides" is such a "human thing," not a "divine thing."  But God does not forsake.


3) What is the invitation in all this?  To trust that God provides, that God sets us to right relationship, that Christ intercedes for that to happen and nothing can prevent God or Christ from reconciling us: to ourselves, to each other, to creation, to God/Christ.


"Holy One, make us whole again, whole with you."


Breathprayer: "Christ Jesus... intercedes for us."



Sunday 24 September 2017

"Called... Glorified."

I feel a genuine sense of peace and gratitude for having received what I ask for the last few days.  May I be present.  May the words of my mouth and the meditations of our hearts bear witness to the presence of the Holy Spirit among us.  As it was in the beginning is now and every shall be.


Romans 8:28-30
28 We know that all things work together for good for those who love God, who are called according to his purpose. 29For those whom he foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, in order that he might be the firstborn within a large family. 30And those whom he predestined he also called; and those whom he called he also justified; and those whom he justified he also glorified.


1) "all things work together for good;" "...conformed to the image of his Son;" "...firstborn within a large family;" "...predestined;" "...called;" "...justified;" "...glorified;"  "those who love God;"


2) Paul really leans into the "chosen" theology here.  Here is where "free will" and "predestination" start to but heads.  Who is "predestined" and who "isn't?"  Here, I can only imagine Paul is being pastoral, not theological.  Haven't we been looking at our own sufferings, the need for the Spirit to intercede with sighs too deep for words because we are simply incapable in our selves to do what is right?  Here, we are reminded that God is already working in us what is right, if we will let God be God in us.  All we have to do is step out of the way.  What does it mean to be one of "those who love God?"  To try to do what is right and true, God's will for us.  If we try to do God's will, God's will be done.  The problems come when God's will proves to be other than our will.  But that's on us again.  I love the last chain of verbs: predestined, called, justified, glorified.


3) To let God be God in us.


"Holy One, assure us that indeed all things work together for good for those who love God, of all traditions, or even absence of tradition.  To genuinely seek justice, love kindness and walk humbly is loving you, predestined, called, justified, and glorified."


Breathprayer: "Called... glorified."



Friday 22 September 2017

"Spirit Intercedes... with Sighs too Deep for Words."

I ask for the grace to be fully present this day.  It has been a long week of one meeting after another, studies, baptismal prep for Sunday and a large funeral this afternoon.  It is the third week in row that has been this intense.  We've dropped some balls and we are underprepared for the funeral.  In another week, we begin our congregational giving program, then thanksgiving, then, thank God, I have two weeks off, during which I'll be catching up with routine medical appointments I don't have time to do while I'm working.  You'd think we would learn to pace the fall after all these years.


Romans 8:26-27
26 Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness; for we do not know how to pray as we ought, but that very Spirit intercedes with sighs too deep for words. 27And God, who searches the heart, knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God.


1) "the Spirit helps us in our weakness;" "...we do not know how to pray as we ought;" "...that very Spirit intercedes with sighs too deep for words;" "...God, who searches the heart;" "...searches the heart;" "...knows what the mind of the Spirit is;" "...the will of God;" "...helps us in our weakness;" "...with sighs too deep for words;" "...searches the heart;" "...the Spirit intercedes;" sighs too deep for words."


2) My first thought is, "Thanks be to God!"  One of the first books I used when learning to use lectio divina  was called Too Deep for Words, by Thelma Hall.  In fact, when I started this blog, I was using the index at the back for tracts of text.  By way of spiritual journeying, I think this is probably one of the most important passages.  Really, we learn to let the spirit pray in us.  But wow, I've known/trusted/believed this 20 years almost, and "I" still get in the way.  Does that mean I have 20 years to go?  Am I half way through the wilderness?  Or do we ever really surrender to this reality?  Today is a thirsty, grumbling, testing day in the wilderness.  If waters shows up, it will only be because it sprang from a rock.  I know and trust that it is good to be here.  I know and trust that this is probably one of the most fulfilling places to be.  "Saints" in this passage refers to all the followers of Christ hence, "the Spirit intercedes for us according to the will of God."  Once again, Thanks be to God!


3) To trust the spirit to intercede with sighs too deep for words.


"Holy One, may your spirit intercede."


Breathprayer: "Spirit intercedes.... with sighs too deep for words."



Thursday 21 September 2017

"Groaning in Labour... Wait for It with Patience."

I ask for the grace to be and do what I need to be and do.  May we let go of what has been so that what can be, can be.  May we trust that God will indeed provide... abundantly.


Romans 8:18-25
18 I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory about to be revealed to us. 19For the creation waits with eager longing for the revealing of the children of God; 20for the creation was subjected to futility, not of its own will but by the will of the one who subjected it, in hope 21that the creation itself will be set free from its bondage to decay and will obtain the freedom of the glory of the children of God. 22We know that the whole creation has been groaning in labour pains until now; 23and not only the creation, but we ourselves, who have the first fruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly while we wait for adoption, the redemption of our bodies. 24For in hope we were saved. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what is seen? 25But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience.


1) "...not worth comparing with the glory about to be revealed to us;" "...creation waits with eager longing;" "...children of God;" "...the creation itself;" "...set free from its bondage to decay;" "...bondage to decay;" "...freedom of the glory;" "...the whole creation;" "...groaning in labour pains;" "...not only the creation, but we ourselves;" "...in hope we were saved;" "...we wait for it with patience;" "...the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory about to be revealed;"


2) How do we keep forgetting this?  "[The] sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory about to be revealed to us."  We've been waiting a long time.  Its like the teacher left telling us we could have a second marshmallow if we waited for her return without eating the marshmallow we have... only she left for 2,000 years!  hence... "we wait for it with patience."  The ultimate in delayed gratification.  I do believe verse 18.  I do believe "the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory about to be revealed to us."  I do believe that.  I do believe we are on the precipice of the glory of the children of God.  But on a cosmic scale... the precipice is relative and that glory may or may not be in my lifetime.  Can we trust that the groaning we hear in creation is indeed labour pains?  "...groan inwardly while we wait for adoption,"  Can we keep our groaning inward?  can we learn to wait for it with patience?


3) To wait with patience.  To trust that the freedom of the glory of the children of God is about to be revealed to us.  To trust the creations' groaning is labour pains for the first fruits of the spirit.


"Holy One, bring us to the joyful conclusion of these labour pains!"


Breathprayer: "Groaning in labour... wait for it with patience."



Tuesday 19 September 2017

"By the Spirit... You Will Live."

I ask for the grace that we might live more truly from our true selves in our identity with Christ, that we might have the courage and strength to let go of our ego needs that only sever the false self, that we might experience ourselves as Children of God.


Romans 12-17
12 So then, brothers and sisters, we are debtors, not to the flesh, to live according to the flesh— 13for if you live according to the flesh, you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body, you will live. 14For all who are led by the Spirit of God are children of God. 15For you did not receive a spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received a spirit of adoption. When we cry, ‘Abba! Father!’ 16it is that very Spirit bearing witness with our spirit that we are children of God, 17and if children, then heirs, heirs of God and joint heirs with Christ—if, in fact, we suffer with him so that we may also be glorified with him.


1) "...we are debtors;" "...you will live;" "...led by the Spirit;" "...children of God;" "...a spirit of adoption;" "...'Abba! Father!" "...that very Spirit;" "..our spirit;" "...children of God;" "if children, then heirs;" "...joint heirs with Christ;" "...we suffer with him;" "...we may also be glorified with him;" "...glorified with him;"


2) It would be nice to experience some of that glory.  "When we cry, 'Abba! Father!' it is that very Spirit [the spirit of adoption] bearing witness with our spirit that we are children of God."  This is grace, this is how easy it is to receive the spirit of adoption into being children of God, heir, joint heirs with Christ... turn to God with greeting of intimate affection: Dad! Mom!  Sweetheart! Lover!  Beloved! Nana!  Opa! Oma!  Poppa!  Desire and maintain that relationship of intimate affection.  And, of course, we treat someone with whom we share intimate affection like someone with whom we share intimate affection, not a stranger, alien, or enemy.  And Jesus reminds us that how we treat "the least of these" is how we treat him.  There are people for whom I certainly do not feel affection.  I can't image I ever would.  But can I treat them with the same kind of care and respect?  I do not always deserve to be treated as well as I am treated.  It isn't about "deserving" it is about who we are, who I want to be.


3) What is the invitation in all this?  To live out of the spirit of adoption, to know that I have been adopted through Christ, to remember that adoption in the Jewish Law of Paul's time was absolute.  Indeed, we are debtors.


"Holy One, put in me a spirit of adoption."


Breathprayer: "By the spirit... You will live."

Monday 18 September 2017

"In the Spirit... the Spirit Is Life."

I ask for the grace to know and be nourished by Christ's presence.  I ask for the grace to let go of ego, "worldly things," and to embrace truth, "divine things." 


Romans 8:9-11
9 But you are not in the flesh; you are in the Spirit, since the Spirit of God dwells in you. Anyone who does not have the Spirit of Christ does not belong to him. 10But if Christ is in you, though the body is dead because of sin, the Spirit is life because of righteousness. 11If the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you, he who raised Christ from the dead will give life to your mortal bodies also through his Spirit that dwells in you.


1) "...you are not in the flesh;" "...you are in the Spirit;" "...the Spirit of God dwells in you;" "...the Spirit is life;" "...will give life to your mortal bodies;" "...through his Spirit that dwells in you;" "...dwells in you;"


2) Really?  I feel very much in the flesh.  I'm short tempered with drivers who cut me off when I'm jogging on the sidewalk; I'm angry at the woman with her dog off leash in a park that isn't "off leash" when she knows her dog triggers when it sees ball caps... good chance of seeing a ball cap in a ball park, even in the morning; I'm deeply frustrated with meetings that get cancelled again and again and again and the work never gets done; I'm overwhelmed with furnishings from the balcony in my living room because its taking over a month for work to be done outside on the condo; I'm utterly overwhelmed trying to get my cat to take her medication... that's a daily wrestling match that constantly breaks my heart... though I have to admit, it's not as bad as it has been.  so I'm feeling very much in the flesh.  And that breaks my heart too.  Is Paul asking us to deny our experience?  Is Paul simply asking us to trust our faith?  I do trust that my experience of the Spirit can be separated from the experience of my circumstances.  My circumstances do not have to determine my responses.  I feel the crashing of the storms, but I don't have to panic, or react.  I feel sadness, but can I respond with hope?


3) To live from the spirit, not from the "flesh."  To let my trust and hope in the spirit guide my actions, even if my inward self is experiencing turmoil and feels justified to throw a fit.


"Holy One, let me live and act out of peace, even if I'm not feeling it in the moment.  Let me trust that peace will return."


Breathprayer: "in the Spirit... the Spirit is life."



Sunday 17 September 2017

"Live... According to the Spirit."

I ask for the grace to receive whatever we need for today.  May our troubled hearts be opened, my our ears really hear, may we be transformed and lead lives of transformation, seeking justice, loving kindness and walking humbly.


Romans 8:5-8
5For those who live according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who live according to the Spirit set their minds on the things of the Spirit. 6To set the mind on the flesh is death, but to set the mind on the Spirit is life and peace. 7For this reason the mind that is set on the flesh is hostile to God; it does not submit to God’s law—indeed it cannot, 8and those who are in the flesh cannot please God.


1) "...according to the Spirit;" "...set their minds on things of the Spirit;" "...to set the mind on the Spirit is life and peace;" "...life and peace;" "...to set the mind on the Spirit is life and peace;"


2) Once again, "flesh" and "spirit" are not meant in anyway literally.  That would lead us into a dualism that is foreign to first century Hebrew ideology.  Paul is talking about what Jesus referred to as "worldly things" and "divine things."  Today, we might think of the "ego"  and the "higher self."  Thomas Merton would say the "false self" and the "true self," in which the "true self" is identity as a child of God, made in the image and likeness of Christ, that identity in which we are all One and able to love our neighbour "as" our self (not "like" our self) in which the illusion of estrangement and alienation from neighbour is revealed as an illusion, the curtain is removed and we can experience that we are all members of the same body.  "To se the mind on the ego is death, but to set the mind on the true self is life and peace."  To set the mind on the ego is to cling to alienation, estrangement, separation.  To se the mind on the true self is to be truly free, to maximize empathy and a capacity to live out a life of genuine compassion.  True life and peace become real.  The ego likes to reassert itself.


3) What is the invitation in all this?  To let go of the false self and commit to the true self, to commit to life and peace.


"Holy One, lead us to life and peace in the Holy Spirit."


Breathprayer: "Live... according to the Spirit."



Saturday 16 September 2017

"God Has Done... According to the Spirit."

I ask for the grace to accomplish what needs to be accomplished today.  I ask for the grace to live fully for the moment, concerned, but not anxious; committed, but not to outcome; invested, but not attached.  May I find the grace to be accepting without expectation.


Romans 8:1-4
8There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. 2For the law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus has set you free from the law of sin and of death. 3For God has done what the law, weakened by the flesh, could not do: by sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh, and to deal with sin, he condemned sin in the flesh, 4so that the just requirement of the law might be fulfilled in us, who walk not according to the flesh but according to the Spirit.


1) "...no condemnation;" "...set you free from the law of sin and death;" "...so that the just requirement of the law might be fulfilled in us;" "...according to the Spirit;" "...no condemnation;" "...in Christ Jesus;" "...Spirit of life;" "...in Christ Jesus;" "...set you free;" "...according to the Spirit;" "...no condemnation;" "...in Christ Jesus;" "...the law of the Spirit of life;" "...in Christ Jesus;" "...the just requirement of the law;" "...according to the Spirit."


2) "Flesh" and "Spirit" are starting to be set in contrast to each other here, but do not refer to our literal bodies and "spirits," which are not separable in Paul's first century ideology.  He's using "flesh" and "spirit" in the way Jesus used "worldly" and "divine" when rebuking Peter.  When we feel like we are navigating an ocean of failure (or even success), we are focusing on "the flesh" or "worldly things."  Jesus and Paul, do not call us to "succeed," but to navigate what may feel like failures without attachment to success or failure, without expectation or outcome.  This isn't "We're fated to fail so why bother," but "We will most likely fail, but we will still do what is right because it is right."  "Whether we live or whether we die, we belong to Christ" will come up at the end of Romans.  St Francis learned to rejoice in his failures.  Bonhoeffer was executed for a failed assassination plot.  Jesus was persecuted and executed in the most ignominious way possible.  None of that is being asked of us, only to die to shame.


3) What is the invitation in all this?  To live according to the Spirit without expectation, without attachment to outcome.


"Holy One, help us to live according to the Spirit, denying the way of the world that would categorize each of us as successes or failures."


Breathprayer: "God has done... according to the spirit."



Friday 15 September 2017

"Delight in the Law... in My Inmost Self."

May we receive the grace of hope.  May we live that hope in our actions.  May we become hope for others, following Jesus, seeking justice, loving kindness, and walking humbly.


Romans 7:21-25
21 So I find it to be a law that when I want to do what is good, evil lies close at hand. 22For I delight in the law of God in my inmost self, 23but I see in my members another law at war with the law of my mind, making me captive to the law of sin that dwells in my members. 24Wretched man that I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death? 25Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord!
So then, with my mind I am a slave to the law of God, but with my flesh I am a slave to the law of sin.


1) "...When I do what is good, evil lies close at hand;" "...inmost self;" "...in my members;" "...captive to the law of sin;" "...Wretched man that I am;" "...Who will rescue me from this body of death?" "...slave to the law."


2) Wretched people that we are.  Who will rescue us from this body of death?  What is the difference between acceptance of what is, surrender, letting go, defeat, capitulation, giving up, and abdicating responsibility?  I want to be accountable for my actions.  This talk about being a "slave to the law of sin" makes it sound like I'm denying responsibility.  But there are thins over which I genuinely have no control.  I think it's Bonhoeffer who points out the difference between Faust declaring, "In the end I can nothing know," and a first year college student saying, "Well, I can't know anything anyway, so why study?"  And there is a difference between surrendering to the will and grace of God after we've sought hard to deny sin, and throwing our arms in the air and saying, "Have a good time now because we are all going to hell anyway."  But when is which?  So... this is why Paul calls us out for judging one another.  Who but Christ has the moral high ground, if indeed, there is moral high ground to be had?


3)  What is the invitation in all this?  To keep seeking to follow Christ.  Maybe to let more time in before making a decision, more time for Christ to make the way forward clear.


"Holy One, I do want in my inmost self to serve you."


Breathprayer: "Delight in the law... in my inmost self."

Thursday 14 September 2017

"Sin... I Do not Understand."


May we have the grace to accept more and expect less as we follow Jesus, seeking justice, loving kindness, and walking humbly.

Romans 7:13-20
13 Did what is good, then, bring death to me? By no means! It was sin, working death in me through what is good, in order that sin might be shown to be sin, and through the commandment might become sinful beyond measure. 14 For we know that the law is spiritual; but I am of the flesh, sold into slavery under sin. 15I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate. 16Now if I do what I do not want, I agree that the law is good. 17But in fact it is no longer I that do it, but sin that dwells within me. 18For I know that nothing good dwells within me, that is, in my flesh. I can will what is right, but I cannot do it. 19For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I do. 20Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I that do it, but sin that dwells within me.

1) "By no means;" "...I am of the flesh;" "...nothing good dwells within me;" "...I can will what is right, but I cannot do it;" "...I do not understand my own actions;"

2) Some of these verses seem so clear and others make my head spin.  Anyone who has lived with anything like addiction can understand: "I can will what is right, but I cannot do it. For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I do."  Addiction is way more pervasive than we think.  We think of drugs and alcohol, maybe food, maybe gambling or spending money.  But we are most pervasively addicted to our own way of thinking.  I may want to think differently, but like a dog to a bone, I go back to the old way of thinking. I see that in ministry so much.  We have a meeting and decide that we are going to do something differently, but seconds later in the hall, we are back to the same behaviour.  Addiction kills.  And our old behaviour, adaptive behaviour that once served us, is now killing us.  Paul points out that it isn't "us" returning to the behaviour, but "the sin that dwells within" us.  The law might have some success in controlling the behaviour, but only grace can genuinely save us and create new behaviours in us.  We need to pray.  We need to stay focused on God's grace.  We need to keep correcting our old behaviour, forgiving the return when we return back, and move on again in the new way of being.  12 steps has nothing  on Paul.

3) What is the invitation in all this?  To accept grace.  To accept the failures and that the failures are do to our inherent nature (original sin?).  To accept the return to grace.  Over and over and over until the new becomes the familiar.

"Holy One, transform our hearts and actions to be just, kind and humble."

Breathprayer: "Sin... I do not understand"


Wednesday 13 September 2017

"Holy... Just and Good."


May we accept more and expect less as we follow Christ, seeking justice, loving kindness, and walking humbly.

Romans: 7:7-12
7 What then should we say? That the law is sin? By no means! Yet, if it had not been for the law, I would not have known sin. I would not have known what it is to covet if the law had not said, ‘You shall not covet.’ 8But sin, seizing an opportunity in the commandment, produced in me all kinds of covetousness. Apart from the law sin lies dead. 9I was once alive apart from the law, but when the commandment came, sin revived 10and I died, and the very commandment that promised life proved to be death to me. 11For sin, seizing an opportunity in the commandment, deceived me and through it killed me. 12So the law is holy, and the commandment is holy and just and good.

1) "...By no means;" "...Apart from the law sin lies dead;" "...

2) Okay, I now laugh every time I see the expression "By no means!"  I can't say I follow Paul's argument here.  Maybe I've not made the passage long enough.  First, I'm not sure I agree with him that "Apart from the law sin lies dead."  This gives an absolute power to the law, that I don't think the law has.  I do think law can increase and magnify sin.  Certainly, we can be oblivious to sin without the law.  But I'm not sure I entirely follow his argument.  I can also agree with "For sin, seizing an opportunity in the commandment, deceived me and through it killed me."  But I would also think that sin was there without the law, I just wasn't aware of it. "I would not have known what it is to covet if the law had not said, you shall not covet."  Hmm... I may not have known that I was coveting, but I think I still would have been looking around, comparing what others have to what I have and wishing I had more, with or without the law.  Is he comparing the law with the awareness that comes with eating the fruit of the tree of the knowledge of Good and Evil?  Be fore the fruit, we had no idea we were naked, after the fruit we learned shame... was it the fruit or the commandment, do not eat the fruit that created the "awareness."  Would we have completely ignored the fruit had we not been told "Don't eat that!"  Highly likely.  The fruit isn't sin.  Eating the fruit is sin.  Is the desire to eat the fruit sin? Would there have been a desire to eat the fruit if we'd not be told don't eat it?  How does this get me to "the law is holy, and the commandment is holy and just and good"?

3) What is the invitation in all this?  Stop being deceived.  Especially, stop being deceived by things we want to be deceived by so we can do what we shouldn't/don't want to be doing.

"Holy One, Lead us to the truth."

Breathprayer: "Holy... Just and Good."

Tuesday 12 September 2017

"Belong to One Another... New Life of the Spirit."

May we gather around the Word, find hope and take that hope into the world, making it a little more kind, a little more just and a little more loving.


Romans 7:1-6
7Do you not know, brothers and sisters—for I am speaking to those who know the law—that the law is binding on a person only during that person’s lifetime? 2Thus a married woman is bound by the law to her husband as long as he lives; but if her husband dies, she is discharged from the law concerning the husband. 3Accordingly, she will be called an adulteress if she lives with another man while her husband is alive. But if her husband dies, she is free from that law, and if she marries another man, she is not an adulteress.
4 In the same way, my friends, you have died to the law through the body of Christ, so that you may belong to another, to him who has been raised from the dead in order that we may bear fruit for God. 5While we were living in the flesh, our sinful passions, aroused by the law, were at work in our members to bear fruit for death. 6But now we are discharged from the law, dead to that which held us captive, so that we are slaves not under the old written code but in the new life of the Spirit.


1) "Do you not know;" "...those who know the law;" "...bear fruit for God;" "...dead to that which held us captive;" "...we are slaves... in the new life of the Spirit;"


2) Paul is not asserting Jewish Law here around marriage.  He is simply using a well known aspect of the law to illustrate the relationship of Jewish Christians to the Law and to Christ... but it isn't the Law that dies, but those who were married to the Law who have died and been raised in Christ to a new set of relationships.  The point of everything is to bear fruit for God.  For us, have we died to our old way of being, the way of fear, distrust, despair, frustration, apathy, self-interest, and allowed ourselves to be under the new life of the Spirit?  Or do we continue to toil under the old way of our being?  I certainly continue to feel bound by old ways of being.  I witness others who are still deeply committed to fear, anxiety, and most distressingly, to scarcity.  There is never enough.  There never was enough.  There is never going to be enough.  We are married to that law and never want to confess anything else.  But Christ's promise, God's promise is not scarcity, it is abundance.  Certainly abundance if we are doing what God has actually called us to do.  We only need to be worried about scarcity if we aren't following.


3) What is the invitation in all this?  To stop worrying about whether or not there is "enough" of whatever: people, money, time, skill, ability... and focus on doing what God wants us to do: gather around the word, find hope, share that hope with the world.


"Holy One, lead us into the new life of the Spirit, help us let go of our marriage to the way of scarcity, self-importance, and spiritual ignorance."


Breathprayer: "Belong to one another... new life of the Spirit"



Monday 11 September 2017

"Sanctification... Eternal Life."

May we desire what is right.  May we know hope and nourishment.  May we let go of what is false and evil.  May we participate in making God's world a little more loving, a little more just, and a little more kind.


Romans 6:20-23
20 When you were slaves of sin, you were free in regard to righteousness. 21So what advantage did you then get from the things of which you now are ashamed? The end of those things is death. 22But now that you have been freed from sin and enslaved to God, the advantage you get is sanctification. The end is eternal life. 23For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.


1) "...free in regard to righteousness;" "...the end of those things is death;" "...freed from sin;" "...enslaved to God;" "...sanctification;" "...the end is eternal life;" "...the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ."   "


2) I'm not sure what that first line means, "free in regard to righteousness."  Does that mean we didn't know what right relationship was and so we had no cause to pursue it?  Hence we did outrageous things?  The first thing that comes to mind is White settlers "settling" land that already had occupants.  We didn't know what right relationship was, didn't really care what right relationship was.  Maybe now we know different.  I am certainly ashamed of how the government of Canada has treated aboriginal people.  Paul, of course wasn't talking about politics in North America, but this modern situation illustrates his argument well.  If we continue to maintain the status quo between settlers and aboriginal people... the end of those things is death.  Right relationship would be the greater advantage... eternal life, in fact.


3) To choose the path to eternal life.


"Holy One, help us want to walk the path to eternal life, the path of reconciliation and right relationship."


Breathprayer: "Sanctification... eternal life."



Sunday 10 September 2017

"Under Grace... Set Free from Sin."

May we have the grace to let go of what is holding us back from living into our true selves.  May we cease to confuse means with ends.  May we gather with open hearts around the narrative of Christ Jesus, be nourished and inspired to make the world a little more just, a little more kind, and a little more loving.


Romans 6:15-19
15 What then? Should we sin because we are not under law but under grace? By no means! 16Do you not know that if you present yourselves to anyone as obedient slaves, you are slaves of the one whom you obey, either of sin, which leads to death, or of obedience, which leads to righteousness? 17But thanks be to God that you, having once been slaves of sin, have become obedient from the heart to the form of teaching to which you were entrusted, 18and that you, having been set free from sin, have become slaves of righteousness. 19I am speaking in human terms because of your natural limitations. For just as you once presented your members as slaves to impurity and to greater and greater iniquity, so now present your members as slaves to righteousness for sanctification.


1) "...By no means;" "...obedience... leads to righteousness;" "...thanks be to God;" "...obedient from the heart;" "...having been set free from sin;" "...slaves of righteousness;" "...I am speaking in human terms;" "...slaves to righteousness for sanctification."


2) "by no means" again.  I wonder if it might have been helpful if Paul had asserted "I am speaking in human terms," more often as well.  Are we "obedient from the heart?"  I'm not always convinced.  Does Paul give enough credit to our "natural limitations" in this passage, or is he trying to be encouraging?  What does it look like to be slaves to "right relationship?"  Sounds like an oxymoron to me... that's the result of our "human terms."  Slave by definition is NOT a  right relationship.  But how can we serve right relationship, rather than Sin?  We should not seek sin, but should seek to serve right relationship.  Obedience is a hard word in our context.  I hear "acceptance," "responsibility," "accountability," "integrity,"  and something about "personal authority" in the notion of "obedience."  Choosing to follow Christ into right relationship, rather than being self-serving and continuing to choose according to the self important ways of the world.


3) What is the invitation in all this?  To want to serve what is right.  To want to live into right relationship.  To want to want to live into right relationship.  To want to let go of the benefits that self interest has brought us.


"Holy One, help us to find obedience in our hearts to the right things."


Breathprayer: "Under grace... set free from sin."



Saturday 9 September 2017

"Instruments of Righteousness... Under Grace."

May our hearts be transformed.  May we live out of our true selves for today and let go of all that has become false.  May we be nourished enough to make the world a little more just, a little more kind, and a little more loving.  May we be a source of hope and light in a world of despair and darkness.


Romans 6:12-14
12 Therefore, do not let sin exercise dominion in your mortal bodies, to make you obey their passions. 13No longer present your members to sin as instruments of wickedness, but present yourselves to God as those who have been brought from death to life, and present your members to God as instruments of righteousness. 14For sin will have no dominion over you, since you are not under law but under grace.


1) "...instruments of wickedness;" "...those who have been brought from death to life;" "...instruments of righteousness;" "...under grace."


2) Why do I find it so hard to remember that we have been brought from death to life?  Its happened, I have been brought from death to life.  We have been brought from death to life.  More than once... again and again, I get distracted, busy, overwhelmed, fearful.  We are "under grace," so act like it.  What is it like to be under grace?  There is freedom there, freedom from anxiety, judgement, isolation.  We are under grace.  We are called to be instruments of righteousness under grace.  Read, "right relationship" for "righteousness" not "self-righteousness."  We are called to be instruments of right relationship: to reconcile, to make amends, to know our past, to say we are sorry, to find hope in the healing and new life that has already happened.


3) What is the invitation in all this?  To shake away the dominion of sin and embrace the dominion of grace.  To seek right relationship.


"Holy One, make us instruments of right relationship under grace."


Breathprayer: "Instruments of righteousness... under grace."


Friday 8 September 2017

"...That Grace May Abound."

I ask for the grace to desire to do what is right, that we be willing to let go of what is so we can more fully manifest our true selves, seeking justice, loving kindness, and walking humbly.


Romans 6:1-4
6What then are we to say? Should we continue in sin in order that grace may abound? 2By no means! How can we who died to sin go on living in it? 3Do you not know that all of us who have been baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death? 4Therefore we have been buried with him by baptism into death, so that, just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, so we too might walk in newness of life.


1) "...that grace may abound?"  "...by no means;" "...died to sin;" "...baptized into his death;" "...baptism into death;" "...glory of the Father;" "...we to might walk in newness of life."


2) Have to love Paul's use of language.  I love his rhetorical questions followed by an answer, "By no means!"  Once again, I wonder just how often he uses that expression in Romans!  But have we died to sin?  Really?  That's not what I perceive around me.  That's not what I experience in my own heart.  Sin keeps calling us back: anger, frustration, impatience, anxiety, fear, self-righteousness, ignorance, willing ignorance, compulsive behaviour... our culture markets compulsive behaviour, markets to, nurtures, creates... And we buy it, even while we try to deny it.  Augustine's prayer, "O God, make us holy, but not yet."  How many chocolate covered almonds have I eaten today because they were available?  Not even pretending to want to do otherwise?  If I can't not eat a chocolate covered almond, how can I claim to have died to sin?  So Paul... Its a pretty argument.  Very pretty.  Your eloquent best.  Genius really.  But I remain unconvinced that many of us mortals can really claim to "have been buried with him by baptism into death..."  But I know that you know what I'm talking about.  I do not do the good I want but the evil I don't want is what I do.  Luther, finally, said "Sin boldly!"  Not as a call to "continue in sin in order that grace may abound."  But acknowledging that if we succeed in dying to sin it is grace in us, not us, that has succeeded.


3) What is the invitation in all this?  To die to sin...  to want to die to sin... to want to want to die to sin... to want to want to want...


"Holy One, may your grace abound."


Breathprayer: "...that grace may abound."



Thursday 7 September 2017

"Sin Increased... Grace Abounded."

May our hearts be transformed.  May we let go of our false selves and embrace our true selves, made in the image and likeness of Christ.


Romans 5:18-21
18 Therefore just as one man’s trespass led to condemnation for all, so one man’s act of righteousness leads to justification and life for all. 19For just as by the one man’s disobedience the many were made sinners, so by the one man’s obedience the many will be made righteous. 20But law came in, with the result that the trespass multiplied; but where sin increased, grace abounded all the more, 21so that, just as sin exercised dominion in death, so grace might also exercise dominion through justification leading to eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.


1) "...justification and life for all;" "...the many will be made righteous;" "...where sin increased, grace abounded all the more;" "...grace might exercise dominion through justification;" "...eternal life;"


2) It just keeps getting better and better with Paul, at least in this passage.  The comparison (weak) between Adam and Christ continues.  I'm not sure how I feel about Eve being left out of Paul's argument entirely.  I'm not sure if its a good thing that at least Eve isn't being blamed for leading us all to condemnation, or if I should be outraged that she's been entirely cut out of the story!  Her absence makes it all the more clear that Paul is building an analogy (a weak analogy) that isn't meant to be taken literally.  The point, is that all can be set into right relationship through the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus Christ.  One person can make an absolute difference for all.  This bears some contemplation.  The world is in pretty bad shape.  North Korea wants to drop bombs on the USA and the 45th president of the USA is daring them.  Political relations between east and west are not good.  Violence is abundant, natural disasters are ravaging the planet and the poor and caught in the chaos in overwhelming numbers.  Right now we are experiencing in Vancouver, BC the hottest weather on record and forest fires are so bad down then entire coast we are engulfed in smoke again... again... Can one man make a difference?  Can the birth, life, teachings, death, and resurrection of one person really make a difference?  Paul's cosmos seemed no larger to him, that ours does to us: eternal is still eternal.  Paul says, "justification and life for all."  I don't go in for Paul's teleology (all those "so that's").  But when sin increases, so does the opportunity for grace to abound.  We're ripe for some pretty amazing grace.


3) What is the invitation in all this?  Contemplate "all," "many," "grace abounded all the more," and "eternal."


"Holy One, let your grace exercise dominion through justification leading to eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord."


Breathprayer: "Sin increased... grace abounded."



Wednesday 6 September 2017

"The Free Gift... Brings Justification."

May our hearts be transformed, may we let go of our false selves and witness our true selves in oneness with Christ.


Romans 5:15-17
15 But the free gift is not like the trespass. For if the many died through the one man’s trespass, much more surely have the grace of God and the free gift in the grace of the one man, Jesus Christ, abounded for the many. 16And the free gift is not like the effect of the one man’s sin. For the judgement following one trespass brought condemnation, but the free gift following many trespasses brings justification. 17If, because of the one man’s trespass, death exercised dominion through that one, much more surely will those who receive the abundance of grace and the free gift of righteousness exercise dominion in life through the one man, Jesus Christ.


1) "...the free gift;" "...much more surely have the grace of God and the free gift in the grace of one man, Jesus Christ, abounded for many;" "...abounded for many;" "...the free gift... brings justification;" "...much more surely;" "...abundance of grace;" "...the free gift of righteousness;" "...dominion in life;" "...the free gift;" "...abounded for the many;" "...the free gift;" "...brings justification;" "...the abundance of grace and the free gift;" "...dominion."


2) Phew!  So very grateful to get this far.  The free gift brought through Christ is so much more abounding that anything that came before.  The abundance of grace, bringing justification and right relationship exercises greater dominion than the trespass ever did.  The free gift is not like the trespass, it is infinitely more abundant and powerful.  Justification means being set into right relationship with the world/people around us.


3) What is the invitation in all this?  To let God set us in right relationship.  There are so many ways in which we are in wrong relationship... relationship of trespass... literally.  Right relationship between European Settlers and Indigenous Peoples require that we let God make amends through us.  We need to admit to ourselves, to God and all other people that we have trespassed, and that we continue to unlawfully, and immorally inhabit land that is not ours, and we need to intentionally and explicitly seek amends, by acknowledging the unceded land on which we gather, and not making unsustainable development decisions without full participation of indigenous peoples and seeking their welfare in development, a few dollars a week for 20 years is not enough.


"Holy One, help us to at least desire right relationship with our neighbours, ourselves, the land, and with you."


Breathprayer: "The free gift... brings justification."



Tuesday 5 September 2017

"One... Who Was to Come."

Holy One, bring us close. Help us to witness your presence in these ordinary words, in this ordinary place, at this ordinary time.  Transform our heart from desolation to hope, from barrenness to joy, from exhaustion to peace.


Romans 5:12-14
12 Therefore, just as sin came into the world through one man, and death came through sin, and so death spread to all because all have sinned— 13sin was indeed in the world before the law, but sin is not reckoned when there is no law. 14Yet death exercised dominion from Adam to Moses, even over those whose sins were not like the transgression of Adam, who is a type of the one who was to come.


1) "a type of the one who was to come;" "


2) This very passage is one of the reasons I avoided continuous reading for 20 years!  What is said here that means anything to me? that resonates in my heart?  Paul is building an analogy between Adam and Christ.  Death is associated with sin.  Real literal death?  It seems to me that according to Genesis, if we do a simply read, mortals were already mortal in the garden and were removed from the garden after eating the fruit of knowledge to prevent them from eating the fruit of life that would make them immortal.  So some form of death preceded Adam's transgression... but first, Adam's transgression isn't reckoned (counted to him) because there won't be law until Moses, some time later.  I think Paul got ahead of himself with this particular argument.  Death didn't spread because of the "sin."  According to Genesis, mortals were already mortals.  So Paul has to be making a very loose analogy, one that isn't intended to stand up to much rigor.  Clearly, there are two "kinds" of death because even after Christ died and was raise, we still die.  Death must be a metaphor for ignorance (as in of the law).  Sin/Death/Shadow is definitely pervasive in the world.


3) What is the invitation in all this?  To wake up.  To deny sin and death their power.  To follow "the one who was to come."


"Holy One, raise us up from death."


Breathprayer: "One... who was to come."

Monday 4 September 2017

"While We Were Weak... Saved by His Life."

Speak, Lord, your servant is listening, transform our hearts.


Romans 5:6-11
6 For while we were still weak, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly. 7Indeed, rarely will anyone die for a righteous person—though perhaps for a good person someone might actually dare to die. 8But God proves his love for us in that while we still were sinners Christ died for us. 9Much more surely then, now that we have been justified by his blood, will we be saved through him from the wrath of God. 10For if while we were enemies, we were reconciled to God through the death of his Son, much more surely, having been reconciled, will we be saved by his life. 11But more than that, we even boast in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.


1) "...while we were still weak;" "...ungodly;" "...while we were still sinners;" "...now that we have been justified;" "...wrath of God;" "...While we were enemies;" "...we were reconciled;" "...having been reconciled;" "...boast in God through our Lord Jesus Christ;" "...received reconciliation."


2) Paul's hitting home a point here: while we were still weak, ungodly, sinners, enemies of God, we were reconciled.  We didn't earn it.  But there is more: now that we are reconciled, certainly we will not be abandoned to our present suffering.  Of course, "reconciled" entails following Christ: seeking justice, loving kindness, and walking humbly.  Can we illustrate this point from our own lives?  When have we received kindness, justice, humility and love when we didn't earn it?  Specific examples.  When did someone forgive me even though I'd not even apologized?  When did someone return my alienating behaviour with affection and compassion?  I can feel the heat in my cheeks as I think of the times I have received empathy in exchange for estranging behaviour.  Have I offered the same?  ever?  We are called to this as a patter of behaviour.  God reconciled us when we were still weak, ungodly, sinners, and enemies of God.


3) What is the invitation in all this?  Perhaps to take some time to record specific instances when I know that I have not received what I "deserved," but received love and compassion instead.


"Holy One, gentle our hearts."


Breathprayer: "While we were weak... saved by his life."

Sunday 3 September 2017

"God's Love... Poured into Our Hearts."

I ask that our hearts be transformed, that we may let go of our false selves, and embrace the truth of who we are, made in the image and likeness of God.


Romans 5:1-6
5Therefore, since we are justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, 2through whom we have obtained access to this grace in which we stand; and we boast in our hope of sharing the glory of God. 3And not only that, but we also boast in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, 4and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, 5and hope does not disappoint us, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit that has been given to us.
6 For while we were still weak, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly.


1) "justified by faith;" "...peace with God;" "...access to this grace;" "...hope;" "...hope of sharing the glory of God;" "...boast in our sufferings;" "...suffering produces endurance;" "...endurance produced character;" "...character produces hope;" "...hope does not disappoint us;" "...God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit;" "...while we were still weak;" "...Christ died for the ungodly."


2) I love this passage and what is to follow.  God's love has been poured into our hearts.  God's love has been poured into our hearts!  GOD'S LOVE HAS BEEN POURED INTO OUR HEARTS!!! It would be enough to sit in those words for a long time.  Has it?  Do we act like it?  Do we feel it?  What does it feel like?  How do we express it?  Do we participate in pouring God's love into others' hearts?  What would that look like?  God's love has been poured into our hearts?  Do we take that seriously, or are they just pretty words?  If only we acted like it.  So many people in the world who call themselves Christians, but I don't see God's love pouring out of their hearts.  But does God's love pour out of our hearts?  Or do we just hoard it, keeping it for ourselves?  That doesn't sound like God's love, at least, not the fullness of it.  God's love has been poured into our hearts... while we were still weak.  God didn't wait for us to be perfect vessels for God's love, but while we were weak... Do we wait for people to be "better vessels" before we invest our love in them?  While we were still weak.  Christ died, not for the saints, and the angelic... but for the ungodly... soon, Paul will say, "enemies of God."  Weak and ungodly... that was the "right time," when we were weak and ungodly.


3) What is the invitation in all this?  To receive God's love poured into our hearts.


"Holy One, pour your love into our hearts."


Breathprayer: "God's love... poured into our hearts"